Editor's note: when I found this conversation in the log, it helped me fill in the gaps of what was happening at the time with the Dude, the company and the project, and how things got so out of control.
The Dude took several deep breaths. He smoothed the cloth of his robes, sat in his throne and stared at the screen in front of him.
The voice that came out of him was quiet, but it was his. "Do you want me to deprioritize my current reports until you advise me of a status upgrade?"
He took several more long slow breaths and cued an answer to his question with a few button presses on his armrest, controlling special software of his own design. "Yes. Make these your primary action items."
"Primary action items." The Dude repeated the phrase. "Primary action items. Action items."
He made a quick gesture in the air, signaling another piece of specialized software to place a call.
"Action items. Action items." He nodded each time he said it. "NOBODY... has ever done this before. That's why it's going to work. Action items. That's why it's going to work. Action items. That's why--" A ping interrupted him.
"Corporate accounts payable, Nina speaking. JUST a moment." That voice, a man's voice, wasn't the Dude, and it wasn't a recording, but it came through the same set of speakers. It was the person on the other end of the line, who I later identified as Darren Emery.
The Dude pressed the buttons on his armrest again. Dialogue played back, sounding distorted and muffled. "The Death Star plans are not in the main computer." Then Doctor Evil played. "If you want it back, you're going to have to pay me... ONE MILLION DOLLARS!" He held his right pinky up to the side of his mouth.
Darren said, "Is that all?"
The Dude responded with another clip through his speakers. "Ve vant ze money, Lebowski."
"Is this the million that's going to let you finish?"
The Dude hesitated, then played back a line with manic pitch. "Gimme da cash!"
The other voice spoke in an even tone. "Look, I can get you another round of funding, but only if you're willing to show what you have. Are you still having that same problem with things disappearing?"
The Dude used Han Solo to voice his answer. "I think my eyes are getting better. Instead of a big dark blur, I see a big light blur."
"Well, that's something." The man on the other end sighed. "How much longer is it going to take?"
The next line was Yoda. "Difficult to see. Always in motion is the future."
"Have you considered my proposal to take the company public, get money from an IPO?"
The Dude played his namesake. "The Dude minds, man." Then he switched to Office Space "I have eight different bosses right now."
"Yes, you would have stockholders, but that just means more people interested in the success of your product. We wouldn't give them any real influence, and you might stand to gain considerably yourself."
"You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet."
"Maybe, but having money sure makes life easier."
"Before we go any further, all right, we have to swear to God, Allah, that nobody knows about this but us, all right? No family members, no girlfriends, nobody."
"Look, I understand the need for secrecy, but I don't want to see this whole project fall apart because you wouldn't go public."
"Han will have that shield down. We've got to give him more time!"
"Dude, I've given you time. We don't know how many other companies are working on this same technology. We need to have this up and running before any of them get to market."
"Nobody has ever done this before."
"That's right. It was a risk on my part, a long shot of a long shot."
"That's why it's going to work."
The other voice laughed again. "You're a tough man to argue with, but if you don't have anything by the time this money runs out, that's the end."
"Don't worry about us, sir. We're solid."
"Alright, I know some places where I can probably squeeze out one more million in operating capital, but if you don't produce something by--"
"We're fine. We're all fine here now, thank you. How are you?"
"I'm serious. I'm not going to enjoy--"
The Dude shut off the connection, and spoke in his own voice again. "Boring conversation anyway."
This transcript was captured from surveillance records during my own investigations, but I didn't know who the man on the other end of the line was until I read the meeting with him later in this notebook.
There's a light, light, in the darkness of everybody's life
